The record high in Kalamazoo for June 14th is 98 degrees, set back in 1920. Tuesday, we will come dangerously close to tying, if not breaking that century-old record. Wednesday could be even worse, with 30-year-old records expected to be shattered with near triple-digit ACTUAL temperatures.

Record heat is crawling. across the country, and the upper Midwest isn't exempt from these crippling temperatures. In fact, we're likely to settle into a significant heat wave for the better part of a week.

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So how does one survive record-breaking heat? Well, aside from the basics - plenty of water, shade, and air conditioning - there's a few other things you can do to stay sane while we LITERALLY sweat through it.


World Record Water Balloon Challenge
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Pools, sprinklers, water balloon fights, heck, just dump a bucket of water over your head (remember the ice bath challenge?) ALL of this is acceptable, even in a workplace scenario.

Seriously! Ask your boss, "Would you rather me be soaked in sweat and smelly in the office, or just wet?"

They might just ask you to go home after a conversation like that, but so be it. Then you don't have to hear from the custodial crew the next day about cleaning up the sopping wet floor in the office.



Not specifically talking about alcohol here (maybe later in the day for the adults). But while you're hydrating all day with added water intake, sneak in a cold Faygo, or grab something REALLY summer-like from Rocket Fizz on the Mall. (I recommend the lemonade seltzer, or a cherry limeade soda.)

But be SURE you're drinking "non-waters" sparingly. Number one priority is hydration. Sugary, and salty drinks are counter-productive.



You'll DEFINITELY need the air conditioner in tip top shape. Be sure you're checking your unit that it's in good running order before it's too late.

That being said, you can't have it running 24/7. We all have bills to pay, and have to keep them in an affordable range. So... plug in those box, tower, and desk fans. They use FAR less energy than your air conditioner will. You won't be AS cool compared to running your A/C heavily, but you can still be comfortable during the height of the heat.

BONUS: The Redneck A/C

If you've got a few bucks, this is an easy one, and actually quite effective. Get a cheap, Styrofoam cooler, a small section of PVC pipe with a bend in it, a small fan, and some ice. Cut two holes in the lid of the cooler - one the size of the pipe, the other, slightly smaller than the size of your small fan. Put the pipe on its hole, and tape it down, Then set the fan face down on the other hole.

FInally, put your ice in the cooler, plug in the fan, and turn it on.

It's not meant for large rooms or anything, but set it right in front of you, and stay chilled for hours, while saving on your power bill. Plus, you have ice handy for your drink.

Sweat Baby, Sweat

2020 Australian Open - Day 3
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If you've been to "hot" cities elsewhere in the country (New Orleans, Houston, Miami, etc.), then you should understand what I'm about to say... soak it in. Let the sweat flow, and don't be ashamed or shy about your sweaty pits or neck-lines. We're all in the same boat. Besides, sweat means you're properly hydrated, and it's your body doing what it's built to do to cool you down.

Yeah, there's probably a bit more B.O. than usual on days like this, but that's just the nature of the sweaty beast. So, maybe just slather on a bit more deodorant and antiperspirant for the day. (Still might not totally get rid of all the B.O., but it helps.)

Be lucky it's been almost 30 years since since the last record was set. Some places in the southwest have seen new record temperatures every year. We have it pretty good in Michigan when it comes to the summers. But like everyone who lives much further south than us, we have to look after each other when conditions get crazy.

Keep an eye on each other while we get through this, and maybe start a water balloon fight with your neighbors?

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