There's an old joke that goes "the person who invented the wheel was smart. The person who invented the other three was a genius." I think the same can be said for soda.
So whether you're running in to Central City Tap for a gift card, squaring away your kid's teachers at Pop City Popcorn, or stocking up on stocking-stuffers at Rocket Fizz, you can park close to the Kalamazoo Mall businesses without shelling out a shilling.
Normally the hottest pepper you can get on the market is called a Scotch Bonnet, which register 250,000 scoville units. The Toe Ff Satan registers in at 9,000,000