Happy freaking Valentines Day.   I hate Valentines Day.  Don't get me wrong... love Kathy more than she'll ever know, but I don't need a specific day to prove it.  The only people I'm happy for are restaurant owners who will get slammed tonight.  Now get off my lawn, you kids!




Pop Quiz

Speaking of Valentines Day, more women than men have lied about this!  What?Answer:  Say "I love you" when they didn't mean it.  A third of women returned an "I love you" out of politeness.  Only a fifth of men have done the same.

One more:  3% of us have done this on a first date... what?Answer:  Declared their love!  That only leads to trouble. (knock, knock, knock, Leonard?....)

More "I love you" trivia here:

The List

Valentines Day World Records.  For the couple who have everything -- try setting a world record!  Here's what you have to beat:The world's longest kiss:  58.35 hours set in Thailand last Valentines Day.

Most hugs in a 24 hour period:  8,709 by Jonathan Sexton at the Bonnaroo Festival in 2011.

World's longest marriage:  86 years by Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher.  Actually, it was 86 years, 9 months, and 16 days.  Herbert died in 2011 at 105.

Largest underwater wedding: 303 divers witnessed the nuptials of Ewa Staronska and Pawel Burkowski.

Largest box of chocolates:  3,725 pounds.  16 feet, 6 inches long.  11 feet, 2 inches wide.  3 feet, 3.5 inches deep.  A Thorntons Moments creation.

Most nights a guy has spent in the doghouse:  We'll find out if you forget Valentines Day, my man.  Get to it!


The Perfect Woman?

The Date Report surveyed 2000 to come up with the profile of the perfect girlfriend.  Ready to take notes, ladies?
  • Brunette
  • Stands 5’5″ and weighs 128 lbs
  • Wears a 34C bra
  • Works as a nurse or a teacher
  • Careful about her diet
  • Gets along with her mother
  • Sexually “adventurous”
  • No tattoos
  • Uses “subtle” makeup
  • Likes skinny jeans and miniskirts
  • Loves Game of Thrones and Dirty Dancing