Aw, Jeez! Another Benson Rant…What You Pumpkin Spice People Did
Pumpkin spice people, this is all your fault. And before that, your potpourri loving ancestors.
Your obsession with pumpkin spice in everything has emboldened others. And now, I hope you're happy.
Jimmy Dean sausage company has just announced a (thankfully) very limited edition sausage scented Christmas wrapping paper. Let that sink in. As you and your loved ones are ripping through box after box, the smell of sausage. Oh, Joy to the World.
To get this wrapping gift from God and Jimmy Dean, you do have to post a picture of you having cooked one of their recipes on their website. Watch the video on the page, it's actually got a few laughs on it. But don't diddle, because it's one of those limited supply of prize deals and I don't want you to miss out.
There's some other kitschy prizes, like an ornament shaped like a roll of sausage, an apron and a used vinyl album recorded by the man himself. By the way, check out the Jimmy Dean bio. Among his accomplishments in show business, he gave Jim Henson his big break with the Muppets.
But remember as you sip your pumpkin spice latte, "It smells like sausage and tastes like paper."